Behavior Suppression: That OG Fake Friend

You know that friend who tells you everything you want to hear and shows you all the things you want to see, but underneath those kind words, polite behaviors, and forced smiles, lie the true feelings they’ll never admit.

Behavior suppression is that OG fake friend.

Behavior (or response) Suppression happens when an animal is exposed to repeated unpleasant aversive actions for exhibiting certain behavior. The dog’s reactions are suppressed, but the emotions driving the behavior remain under the surface. 

Here’s a human example for reference: 

A teenage boy trips and falls. He’s embarrassed and begins to cry. His father nearby scolds him for crying “C’mon Son, Don’t be a baby! Be a man. Men don’t cry!”

A similar situation happens a few days after. The teenage boy misses an easy free throw while playing basketball with his dad. He begins to cry with embarrassment. The father scolds him again, “Stop crying like a little girl! I’ll give you something to cry about!”

Now whenever the teenage boy is with his dad, he consciously makes an effort not to cry. He is still embarrassed when he messes up or is hurt, but he holds in his feelings for fear of his dad’s disappointment and hurtful scolding. The crying behavior has been suppressed. The feeling of embarrassment is still there, but he is now afraid to express those feelings. 

Now a dog example:

Fido is the best boy, BUT he’s suuuper scared of new dogs. While out on a walk, he sees an extra scary strange floof. Fido tries his hardest to make that dog go away by barking and lunging. Fido’s mom jerks his leash really hard and the slip lead tightens around his neck. Ouch.

The very next day Fido goes on another walk and sees another super scary dog and tries to yell at the dog to go away by barking and lunging. Fido’s mom jerks the leash extra hard this time too, and the slip lead tightens around his sensitive neck.

Now whenever Fido goes on his walks and sees scary dogs, he consciously makes an effort not to bark and lunge. He is still very scared of new strange dogs, but even more scared of what will happen if he barks and lunges. The barking and lunging have been suppressed, but those fearful feelings are still there, he’s just afraid to express his fear. 

     It’s super important to understand that while dogs are definitely not humans, they have feelings, and oftentimes their behavior stems from their emotional state. Sometimes we don’t quite understand that behavior and from our perspective, we may think there’s no need for them to be scared or react in certain ways….but for our dogs from their perspective, the behavior works for them. All behavior has a function for the individual exhibiting it, and we really are doing our dogs a disservice if we don’t dive deeper into the purpose and feelings behind our dog’s behavior. 

The sudden change in our dog’s behavior can sometimes appear magical: 

“Wow. Fido can now walk past groups of dogs without a peep! That’s amazing!”

But is it? Is it really magical that while on the surface Fido is forcing a smile and exhibiting all the appropriate behaviors, he’s quietly feeling everything. 

Spoiler alert: the fallout of behavior suppression far outweighs the magical transformative (and temporary) benefits long term. A few things can begin to happen when we suppress our dogs’ reactions: 

1) Those feelings bubble over in other experiences for our dogs. Fido may not react to other dogs when on a leash, but may begin to react to other things in other situations more intensely. 

2) Our dogs can begin to pair negative associations to the things around them when an aversive stimulus is used repeatedly. For example, When I (regretfully) used a shock collar with my Nadia years ago, it was consistently used while at the dog park. I can only assume based on the trend in her sociability with other dogs that she began to associate the “shock” stimulation with other dogs, creating a heightened distrust and discomfort in meeting new dogs generally. This continues to affect her new dog interactions even to this day, although we’ve made huge strides with our switch to positive reinforcement-based methods. There is even a warning on the packages of shock collars stating that there is a risk of your dog redirecting their aggression onto the handler. Hmmm 🤔 

  3.) We may lose important and informative early warning signs, and our dogs may feel the need to resort to other behaviors to express their feelings. A dog punished enough for growling at a toddler when they are uncomfortably approached, may stop growling….but they continue to be approached by this scary short clumsy two-legged creature, and they continue to be uncomfortable with this. This may lead to a bite “out of the blue” because their warning growl has been suppressed. 

It’s fine. I’m fine. Everything’s fine but underneath are All The Feelings. 

*Bites tongue to keep those feelings buried deep down*

     So what can we do instead? Behavior modification. This is where true behavior change takes place. We not only take into account those behaviors and reactions we’re seeing on the surface, but we dive deeper into the emotional state that drives those behaviors. We pair positive associations with the scary things to make them less scary. We provide our dogs with clear communication and guidance to create alternative behaviors. We encourage and empower our dogs with choice and autonomy. If we help Fido to feel safer around other dogs, barking and lunging will no longer be a functional behavior for him. Under the surface is where real, effective, and long-term learning takes place.

F*** fake friends. Let’s form genuine friendships with our furry life partners.